How Not To Write Your Ignite Phoenix Presentation

So I started with the best intentions. I wanted to get the ol’ creative juices flowing and I thought I would share with you how my practice on Tuesday went, which I’m still feeling now. (My legs look like a thoroughbred’s — good thing? I don’t know either.)

But this latest practice was for Sevens Rugby or Rugby Sevens. See, I’m not quite sure myself. I’ve never played Sevens.

The plan was to do a little research, whip up a quick post and then be on my way with said presentation. My search began with YouTube as I wanted to show you the difference between Sevens and what I’ll call “regular rugby.” I found some decent footage and then I found the greatest (and I’m not being sarcastic when I say this), the greatest time suck. Ever.

This little gem here:

Did you give the video just a quick cursory glance? Then look again. Something just isn’t right. Why are there men in the background wearing full on Lycra exercise outfits and waving pom poms?

Of course I was intrigued and I clicked to the guineapigs’s channel — I even subscribed! — and watched all 55 videos. And like that, two hours were gone. Wasted? I think not.

Do you call this video a waste? Surely not. Look at those determined faces!

Or, not. Perhaps this humor wasn’t for everyone as I found that the Human Guinea Pigs only made it through two seasons (and the first season was rough — or the clips that made it on to YouTube). Nonetheless, my heart and my attention span went to the “pigs” as they were subjected to cruel and unusual punishments.

Bias Alert: I realized that I’ve always hated Jackass. Perhaps because they did the pranks to themselves. Or perhaps I like the “pigs” because as the videos will show they’re being subjected to experiments and not always sure why (playing that victim card). Or, maybe it has something to do with their accents. Or maybe I’m becoming aware of the potential that in another life I was a frat boy.

Either way, I can’t invest any more time to it. But you can! Check out these fantastic time-sucking videos and I’ll go and finish my presentation.

This time sans YouTube.

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